I gotta tell you this…
About a month or two ago, a little shrunken, wrinkley old lady came to my door. She had her head and eyes lowered and told me a story:
“There was a tragedy, the Martinez boy in the next building passed away this morning. He was 5 years old and he got electrocuted.”
Me: *GASP* OMG what happened?
“He touched the back of the family’s TV and his hands were wet.
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”
Me:
At this point I realized she was not some gossiping old lady, but someone trying to hit me up for cash…I said: That’s terrible.
She goes: “So we’re going around the neighborhood collecting what we can to help her bury her son.”
This is where she raised her face/eyes to me and I noticed her mouth was devoid of teeth and her mustache was thicker than John’s (and somehow jet black though her hair was gray)….
*gag*
Anyway…I apologized, told her I didn’t carry cash but was happy to donate online with my credit card if there was a website or something set up…..
I couldn’t even get my sentence out before she rolled her eyes and walked away.
Fast forward to last night:
Guess who knocked on my door!!!
I recognized this crackhead shyster immediately, but I guess all the crack made her forget she’s visited my door before. She gave me the same exact story about that poor Martinez boy! I had to start laughing, I told her, I remember this story from the last time he died and she said “Thank You!” and scurried away. HAHHAA
WTF?!!
I’m laughing even as I write this. You can’t make these things up folks.
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HAAAAAAAA OMG this is hilarious!!!! No teeth and a black mustache….Scurries away….fateful return with the same dry story… No you cant make this up!!!
I gasped too when I read he was electrocuted and then started LOL! “Rolled her eyes,” you apparently weren’t the first to not fall for her ploy. “Scurried away.” LOL
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HAHAHAHAHA! the description of her teeth and facial hair is pirceless! LoL
Hilarious! This is literally Laugh Out Loud funny
Oh wow! That is STRANGE! NYC never ceases to amaze me.
What?! Damn, I’ve seen those people on the subways & trains, but they’ve never come knocking on my door. Bwahaha!! 🙂
LMAO!! This reminded me of some of my run-ins with crackheads. It’s sad that drugs have taken over their life to point they make up lies about death though.
HAHAHHAAH omg, there are definitely some crazy people walking around.
LMAO!!!
hahahaha, too funny …. i don’t know if i should feel bad about how hard i am laughing at this post!
This is funny…I would have laughed out loud too! At least she didn’t cop a ‘tude when you told her you already knew the story!
This was funny. Dang, when I first started reading it, I was like, “oh man, a boy died.” but then after reading the rest I’m like, “damn, people ain’t got no shame.”
Like Ms. Pancakes said, at least she didn’t “cop a ‘tude.”
Girl lol @ I told her, I remember this story from the last time he died. Gotta Love It!!
That Eddie Murphy expression was priceless for this story…HaHa
HAAAA!!!!! I love your response when she knocked on your door the second time. And that Eddie Murphy picture is PERFECT.
LMBO!!! Glad you reposted this for TBT
i am a crackhead myself, clean and sober for 25 years i can believe it. I too can tell some stories of my own