So. This morning I was writing/editing a little essay that I started months ago but never got to finish. It’s about this whole “swirling” trend going on now. There seems to be a movement consisting of black women who’s goal in life is to attract, marry and procreate with white men. I didn’t realize it was such a “thing” until my cousin told me recently that John and my maternity shoot photos are all over interracial tumblr blogs, which led me down a googley rabbit hole of interracial relationship stuff…but majority seemed to be black women / non black men related.
You know, I love getting emails from blog readers, and I get a fair amount (which sidebar: makes me feel cool). The majority are comments and questions about John, our marriage, raising a biracial son….things we’ve had to deal with. (second place goes to hair questions, and third place goes to random stuff like “where’d you get those boots?”)
And I also get a lot of emails from women asking for advice, or sharing their story with me. There seems to be a mix of well meaning questions stemming from genuine curiosity….to weird fetishy type questions, judgey, racist/ignorant comments and some sentiments of “awe.” (weird)
I didn’t really see my marriage as a big deal before. Well, it’s always a big deal for me, of course (it’s MY effin marriage)… I just didn’t see my marriage as something bigger than me before. Or something that other people would care enough to question or comment on. Now I realize, bittersweetly, that my marriage isn’t just a marriage. It’s an interratial marriage. It’s different. Yes. Even though we married for love, and we see interracial couples everywhere, it’s nothing for us….however…it’s a big deal for other people.
I wasn’t going to bring race, politics, religion and “hot” topics like that into my blog, but now I realize, as far as race goes, I can, should, and will bring it here to OK, Dani. I’m definitely not the “interracial marriage poster child” (despite my preggo belly on those people’s tumblrs) nor am I “down with the swirl” (a “movement” that in my opinion, fetishizes white people, regarding them as a trophy to be won by the po black man/woman who gets lucky) but I am a black woman, married to a white man, raising a biracial son and living in a racial world.
My voice is “different” and I don’t mind sharing it loudly.
So, I’ll be answering your questions and responding to your emails here. Sorry it took me so long to “get it” people.
Sidebar: Don’t you kinda wish interracial marriage wasn’t a “thing?” Wouldn’t it be nice if marriage was just called marriage no matter the color of the bride and groom?
Hit it Mike: