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I am a Hypocrite and I Can’t Sleep

What time do you go to bed?

What time do you wake up?

Honesty time:

I have been sleeping so poorly lately and I just cant take it anymore.

I felt like a hypocrite last week on a call with a potential client when she mentioned not being able to fall asleep easily. I immediately shared my ‘go to’ advice on this. (which is to write out in a journal everything on your mind before bed) She loved the idea and vowed to take it. And I immediately felt like a moron. How could I give this great advice and not take it my damn self.

I used to wake up at 5am and get shit done like a bawse. I’d go to bed around 10-11, falling asleep easily, sleep all through the night and wake up with energy to spare. I’d rock out my morning routine before anyone woke up and be so prepared for my day, and be extra productive during it. (I even wrote a lil ebook about it!)

Now?

::sigh::

I toss and turn when I try to go to sleep. I wake up 5011 times a night when I do fall asleep fairly easily. Any movement from John, or fart from an ant outside will wake me. I end up falling into my deepest sleep around 5am and then try to stay asleep while John gets ready for work, and Rohan starts his noise. Then I wake up grumpy and upset with myself. My kids sleep through the night 99.9% of the time, so I can’t use them as an excuse.

I had to do what I tell my clients to do: take an HONEST look at what I’m doing (or not doing) for my wellness in this area.

When I’m honest, I realize I’m not doing any of the healthy sleep habits I could be cultivating. I’ve read so many articles on tips for getting great sleep over the years, yet I’m not practicing what I’ve learned anymore. So I’m going back to it.

Here’s my plan for getting back to good sleep:

Consciously choose to get good sleep

This step alone is a big deal even though it sounds simplistic. I read in Hal Elrod’s book, to decide to have a good night’s sleep before putting your head on the pillow. He said to literally say: “I’m going to have quality, restful sleep and sleep through the night and wake up refreshed and well-rested.”

No phone or laptop an hour before bed

This is honestly going to be very hard for me as I tend to work until my eyes go half mast on most nights. The light from these devices (and TVs btw) disturb your sleep and ability to fall asleep easily, so I’m cutting this habit out. *gulp!*

No working in bed, keep the bed for sleep only

This may be the hardest habit to change. I work in my office rarely, at the kitchen table 1/2 time, and in bed 1/2 time. My back likes it. But, I’ll be intentionally working from my office and the kitchen table going forward. And I wont snuggle in bed and watch a show with the kids. We’ll snuggle on the couch in the family room to watch movies instead.

Go to bed at 11pm, no exceptions

I got this one. I can make it happen. Being very strict with myself about stopping work no matter where I am on the project will be a struggle at first because that “just one more thing” syndrome catches me sometimes. Lately I’ve been watching House of Cards with John at night so it’ll be easy to just….not do that. 🙂

Journal right before bed and make an exhaustive list of everything on my mind

I’m tweaking my nighttime routine. I journal during the day, usually when the kids are down for naps, but will switch to evenings before bed. I’ll list out all the items plaguing me so I can rest my head with all worries out of it.

Wake at 6am and immediately get out of the bed

I’m not even going to try for 5am just yet. Going with 6am and see how it goes with getting quality sleep. 11pm to 6pm. I can do this. And as soon as I wake up, I’m getting right out the bed with the 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 technique.

If I wake up and my mind starts racing, I’m going to either write out more of what I’m thinking about, or do some breathing exercises, a calm app or short guided meditation and try to go back to sleep again. I will not get out of bed, and I will not turn on the TV…or go to facebook on my phone (my current go-to)

I am slightly nervous about this, but I am determined to get back to good sleep, and back on track with my morning routine. It just makes life so much better! Wanna join me?

How is your sleep?

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Chantal Lusk

Wednesday 12th of July 2017

Great article Dani! I read it all and LOVED it! I have always been an advid journaler and am still "advid" in my mind, lol, but I need to work on it in actuality. I have been plauged by worries on my mind A LOT lately (our house flooded and we are living out of hotels at the moment). I invision myself journaling (why I feel like I am still am advid journaler, lol), but am too physically tired to actually do it, but your post here has encouraged me to start to try and do this again bc I use to do it all of the time. Plus my family and I go to a program called Celebrate Recovery (CR). It is for anyone who has any hurts, any habits, and any hang ups. IT IS AMAZING!!! They also use this technic (journaling before bed) in a similar way...to keep the mind cleansed on a daily basis. Thank you for the encouragement Dani! I got a little more strength to do this now. xo Chantal

Neyssa

Tuesday 27th of June 2017

This has been my struggle the last month. My 19 month old still wakes up a lot through the night,and insomnia kicks my butt til one or two. Then I sleep til the kids let me. It's horrible. So bad. I will try writing lists etc and no electronics at night, to see if that helps. Thanks for the tips, hope you get good sleep.

Cece

Wednesday 21st of June 2017

Mine is usually terrible. I have dealt with insomnia on and off for years and had the worst flare up starting around October last year. I went to a sleep class in January through my health carrier and I learned a lot about how well we sleep is mental. I've been working to change my attitude about sleep and develop a sleep hygiene routine that will help. I also take a sleeping pill. My thing is, I don't have kids. I should get to sleep. But dang!! It doesn't always work out that way. I hope you start sleeping better.

Dani

Saturday 24th of June 2017

A sleep class....hmmm... maybe I will check one out to get some more tips! thanks. Is your sleep all good now?

AprilD

Wednesday 21st of June 2017

I'll join! My mini still wakes frequently but maybe maybe his sleep schedule will be better if I improve my own.

Joyce Brewer

Tuesday 20th of June 2017

You're not alone. I set an alarm around 4:30 a.m. and usually snooze it to death. My Mom would say listen to your body and get the rest you need.

Dani

Tuesday 20th of June 2017

4:30? You're gangsta! I wish I could get the rest I need. Though I did nap like it was my job, this past weekend. Now back to nonsleeping...

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