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#FitnessFriday Confession: I’m Not Happy With My Body Anymore

current body situation may 2015

I’m not happy with my body and I’m doing something about it.

I love my body and am grateful for all it can do. My frame is small, I’m generally slim, but I am frustrated by my personal trouble zone (read: Belly) and my overall lack of muscle tone. (That last pic above, I’m flexing with all my might, and you cant see an ab for miles.) And it’s all my doing.

It hit me hard a couple days ago after I booked our cruise but my feelings of discontent have been simmering on and off lately for a while now.

I booked the cruise and went to send a note to John saying “Only 25 days til we cruise!” Then I got punched in the stomach. 25 Days? 25? I can’t be beach-ready in 25 days!! OMG I have to diet, OMG I have to go run, OMG OMG OMG…..

Then I got my shit together and got real. There’s only so much that’s happening in 25 days, and I’m not the crash diet / overdo exercise type. (Plus that’s useless and causes yo yoing)

I had to take a look, a hard look, at what I have been doing lately.

I eat well, but I do eat a lot of sweets. I workout, (currently the 21 day fix workouts) but only a few times a week mixed with running.

I have the safety net excuse of “but I work out” to pardon myself for not eating as clean as I could be. But when I really look at it. Ummm I’m in my 30s and had two kids close together, 3 days a week of exercise (and not the most intense) just aint gunna cut it anymore, especially if I’m not eating super clean.

I then had to look at what I haven’t been doing lately.

  • I haven’t been pushing hard at my workouts
  • I haven’t been turning down the myriad sweets at the office
  • I haven’t been staying away from Rohan’s plate after he’s done eating
  • I haven’t been declining the ice cream John brings me at night
  • I simply haven’t been diligent

It’s not easy to face your failings, and yes, I’m fairly slim, but I don’t look (or feel) fit. It brought up a lot of feelings of fraudulence. Like “how can you be helping women create healthier lives when you’re messing up your damn self.”  Hello, Imposter Syndrome.

But no, I know what I do brings value, and helps my clients, when I feel down I can just look at the thank you emails I’ve saved LOL! (yeah, I read em when I need a boost, #judgemeifyouwanna!)

So what do you do when you’re slacking (by your own standards) and need to kick your fitness into high gear? For me, it always starts with setting a goal.


My goal: Abs

Yep. Abs. #that’sit

By year’s end, I will have a flat tummy with some visible ab definition without having to suck my belly in…. too much. HA!

I know it sounds simple, but having abs is the result of me doing what I need to do. It’s a visible representation that I am consistently eating clean and low(ish) carb, and consistently working out hard to reveal them. I wake up at 5:30, and most days I do a workout, but I’m going to go full out with my 21 Day Fix workouts each morning for 21 days (then switching to p90x3 after our return)


 And I’ll be continuing my slow carb diet. I LOVE the 21DayFix workouts, but wont be doing the meal plan (though I suggest everyone try it at least once. GREAT at teaching portion control.)

My starting point is pictured above… I can’t wait to be able to post my afters. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about being the best I can be, healthfully and challenging myself.

So, goal is set, and plan is in place. I personally need accountability, which is why T25 was so beneficial for me. I was in a challenge group and had the accountability, constant motivation, support and inspiration from the others. 



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Sunday 3rd of May 2015

I just finished the 21 day fix!!!! I have lost inches and I am doing it again starting tomorrow before my vacation. Girl, knowing we aren't perfect and what we need to work on is key. Kudos.


Sunday 3rd of May 2015

Confession is so good for personal strength. I looking forward to getting back in shape post baby. I know you will be successful with your abs goal. Wishing you the best.

Diatta @ Femme Fitale Fit Club

Sunday 3rd of May 2015

Everyone falls off the wagon and I am sure you will come back stronger than ever.

Jay'L Harris

Sunday 3rd of May 2015

I love your candor and honesty. Keep inspiring people


Saturday 2nd of May 2015

ahhh abs...I remember those.....

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