Birthday Goals

happy birthday to me

Happy Birthday to me!!!

34 was a great year. So many wins in life and biz.

So…I turned 35. It’s such a milestone birthday for me!! Next milestone is the big 4-0. *squeal* ::gulp::

We celebrated with a much needed “momcation” on board the Norwegian Sky for a weekend getaway to the Bahamas. It was awesome, but I’ll tell you all about it in my recap post. (Instagram has a few highlights) For now, let’s focus on Birthday Goals!

I like to share a few of my goals for the year here partially to inspire readers to do the same, an partially for accountability. It’s nice to see what I do and don’t do over the year…

Last year these were the miracles I was supposed to create:

  1. Have the house and land improved/renovated –not renovated, but definitely much improved!
  2. Be in the best shape of my life — um… what had happened was….
  3. Have a thriving business and earn $xxxxxx by my bday — ::makes it rain::
  4. Be paid to travel internationally – well…I got sponsored travel internationally!
  5. Have an ebook for sale on Amazon – Not mine, but I’m in a few that are for sale 🙂
  6. Have an even stronger, loving and connected marriage — Yes! This just gets better and better. <3
  7. Be comfortably homeschooling the kids — Yes and full posts on this to come
  8. Have a more simplified life/lifestyle — Yes! And simplifying even further. I love it.
  9. Have a new tattoo (or 2) — Didn’t even look for an artist lol
  10. Be closer to fluent in Spanish — ummm… hola? Nah, I dont think I’m closer to fluent, but we’re working on it!
  11. Grow my biz and brand — Yup!
  12. Have taken a vacay solo (#momcation), one w/ both kids, and one with just John – Done!! Cruising as we speak!
  13. Have Kaya fully potty trained 🙂 – She only wears training pants overnight and for naps but she wakes up dry!
  14. Save $xxxxx to Roey & Kaya’s accounts — Done!
  15. Print publication, radio and tv appearances — This year I crack the TV beast.

That’s not bad b. I did fairly well! John and I were just talking about tattoos the other day. I can’t wait to ink my whole body up. (ok not my WHOLE body, but still.) The book is dragging because I’m not staying accountable with writing. Spanish…it’s low priority#realtalk but I know I’ll be fluent sooner than later.

Here’s what I’ll create by my next bday:

  1. All rooms of the house redecorated and pared down cozy minimalist style
  2. Travel somewhere new and have explored Florida areas more
  3. Have gotten more tats (and have John have some ink on him too)
  4. Have hit $xxxxxx in biz earnings for the year
  5. Have a backyard garden started and maintained with the kids
  6. Have appeared on TV, radio and print media again
  7. Have a comfy new car
  8. Have a proprietary product for sale and be actively coaching again
  9. Have completed a physical fitness challenge of some sort

I have a feeling I’ll reach these and then some! I actually do a lot of journaling around this time of year and have a long list of miracles I plan on creating before I turn 36. Wish me luck!

Do you set birthday goals? What’s on your list?


Monthly Goal Setting Tips

monthly goal setting tips okdani blog

You already know I’m a personal development junkie so I thought I would share my monthly goal setting tips and techniques for this fresh month. I’ll be honest, I usually complete my monthly goal setting a day or two before each new month so I’m ready to start the month off with a bang.

Monthly Goal Setting Tips

Look back to look ahead

Take a look at your major goals you’ve set for the year (or quarter) and see where things stand. Don’t judge yourself if you haven’t completed them, just look and be aware of where you are.


Do a Brain Purge of everything bogging up your mind. Old to dos, projects, errands, appointments, ideas, future events, everything. Get it all down in one long list. Order doesn’t matter, neatness and spelling doesn’t count, just get it all out so you can move forward with a clear head.

Sort & Filter

Sort your list. You may be able to just delete some items, move some to later down the line, give some to other people to handle for you. Then filter your list by area of life.

Decide on your month’s focus/plan

What areas of life are you going to be focusing on? What makes the most sense in your life right now? What would be the best focus for what your larger/longer term goals are? Decide on what area you’ll focus on so you don’t dilute your efforts and “waste” time on less important tasks.

setting goals okdani blog

Set Goals for just the month

Use your bigger goals to determine what you will tackle this month. We can consider your monthly goals mini or midsize goals. Get them down on paper. For the love of god do not try to wing it.

Make your goals SMART

I know we’ve covered this before but SMART is an acronym meaning Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Time-bound. So make sure your goal isn’t vague and fits the SMART criteria.

Create Actions and Prioritize

This is where folks fall off. And it makes all the difference in the world. We cant just write the goal and walk away. We have to break it down into what needs to be done to actually attain it. Then we decide what needs to be done now vs later.

Calendar it ASAP

Whip out your planner or your google calendar….whatever you use…and pencil in the action steps for the next month. I don’t suggest you log action steps further than that because things may need to be tweaked.

Plan your party

Decide what you’re going to do to celebrate your wins. You’re all organized now with your goals broken down into actionable steps so you’re definitely going to get ’em done.

Take action NOW

Do one tiny thing…anything! Making even the tiniest action step forward does a lot for your motivation/drive and esteem. Get to work!!

Now you can just do the bite sized actions each day to reach whatever your goals are. For some folks (including me, sometimes) looking at a list of big lofty amazing goals feels good…and can feels daunting/overwhelming at the same time. That’s why it’s extra important to break it down each month. Things feel better when they’re doable. Good luck!

What are your top goals for the month?

2016 New Years Resolutions and Goals

2016 goals and resolutions small

Every year I make a new year resolution or two, and then I make my real goals for the year separately.

My goals for 2015 (really a to do list), I crushed em. ::dusts shoulder off::

They were:

  • Buy a home and fix it up bit by bit
  • Improve my financial standing
  • Deepen my spiritual practices
  • Nurture my marriage
  • Be a kickass mom to Kaya and Roey
  • Relaunch my life/wellness coaching business
  • Have visible ab definition
  • Develop my Florida social circle

I reached them all..ish.

*COUGH*except the last two…*COUGH*

I put those last two in orange and not red because they weren’t a total fail. I have slightly more ab definition than I did earlier in the year, but I’m not where I want to be just yet. And I have like 2 friends down here in Florida, not digging the moms I meet at the playground lol..::shrug::… so I did start to develop my FL social circle even though it’s not a very big circle.

I shared my mid-year progress here.

For 2016 my to do list is:

  1. Continue to be an engaged, on-purpose mom to Rohan and Kaya
  2. Get that ab definition I didn’t get in 2015 ::avoids eye contact::
  3. Launch a successful black fitness website and grow it to XX size
  4. Take a kickass family vacation (and be IN the photos)
  5. Earn enough in January to “justify” getting our cleaning lady back for the year 🙂
  6. Make $XXX from my business by Dec 31
  7. Return to making videos 
  8. Expand (a lil) and deepen (a lot) my FL circle of friends
  9. Attend a conference I’ve never been to
  10. Beautify/fix up my home and land more and more

2015 my two resolutions were:

  1. Be out in nature every day – totally did it!
  2. Get my sexy back – totally….almost…kinda sorta…maybe just a little bit did it. (I’m back in shape but not yet satisfied)

This year I’m making a few resolutions.

In 2016 I resolve to…

  1. Get more sleep
  2. Be more open and vulnerable
  3. Be more adventurous and brave

Get More Sleep

I know that sounds like a lazy way to start this year off, but I have had chronic sleep issues ever since I became a mom. I sleep so much lighter now, that almost any sound wakes me up. I was up so much with Roey I got vertigo and was falling down. Then Kaya with her colickiness… ugh. Both kids sleep through the night thankfully, but Ro gets sick sometimes or comes into our room to pee or gets scared…. I sense when Ro wakes up in his room and know he’s on his way in…at some random ungodly hour. And if he doesn’t wake in night (which is most nights, thankfully) he wakes up for good at the buttcrack of dawn (which used to be OK, but I’ve changed my schedule so 5am is not the move anymore.) I sleep in fear. (You can laugh, it’s OK)  I literally sleep in fear and anxiety of Rohan waking me up in the night with a fever or something. So I sleep extra light and wake up often. That’s SO not ok.

Sleep is so important, and is essential to our overall health. My sleep is so erratic and fragmented which effects my energy level, my mood, my eating… it’s all connected. I notice the difference in my patience with the kids (and everyone else) on days when my sleep is crap.


I resolve to nap if the urge hits, no matter if I’ve got a mile-long “to do” list.

I resolve to make John get up with the kids on the weekends.

I resolve to not spend the hours I’m awake in the middle of the night worrying about being poorly rested the following day lol.

I resolve to get some ambien or something if need be.

I resolve to get some more damn sleep!

OMG That was a long explanation wasn’t it?  Anywaaaay….

Be more open and vulnerable

So, this is something I started personally lately and it feels good. I feel like I’m an open person in general, I like to share. Hence: blog. However, I don’t usually show my vulnerable side, or ask for help as much as I could. I realized it in my marriage and catch myself going into my automatic “I’ll handle it, I can fix it” mode when it’s just as easy…and better off for my mental and emotional health… to ask John to handle something (even if he gives me an attitude for the request.)

Being more open this year is being more receptive to the offers that come my way (on any level) and sharing more of me and my story with others in my off-line life and on. With regard to this blog, I started it with the desire to connect and relate… being more open and even more vulnerable here will help in that desire.

Be more adventurous and brave

This is a resolution on a lot of levels. From simple things like trying to cook new meals…to taking a different type of vacation…wearing a crop top or bright lipstick….trying different challenges….exploring around my area…  To “bigger” things like… reaching for goals that are “higher” than my current standing…. submitting to speak at more places…pitching myself to different types of opportunities….

These three resolutions I know are going to be up and down…a constant behind the scenes effort. And certainly a work in progress…but I know that as I work on those resolutions I’ll be happier and even more confident in my daily life.

What is your #1 Goal for 2016? You making any resolutions?


Hello October

hello october

Happy October Everyone!!

Never thought I’d say this, but… I miss the October chill of New York. It’s just one constant summer down here. (Not complaining. I love the heat…and humidity… yeah I’m that person.) I just miss the sweater and boots weather. I miss the light trench weather. I wear shorts all the time. No that’s a lie. I wear gym clothes all the time. BUT… if I weren’t in gym clothes, I’d be in shorts ALL the time. 🙂

September was cool. It was a fresh start for me (Like I mentioned here)

  • Restarted exercise after my hernia surgery
  • Enjoyed being home with my two lil munchkins
  • Attended Blogalicious for the first time (I’ll recap it, I swear!)
  • Turned 34 years young 🙂
  • Got revved up in business

My goals were to: 

  1. Get in a groove w/ SAHMing – Done!
  2. Pare Down House – Done and still in progress
  3. Make Biz plan for duration of year – Done!

How was your September? 

Now October is here and I’m ready to take it on! I sat down yesterday and went over my plans for the quarter. I have a lot of work ahead, but all good things for good reason. I’m excited. I won’t bore you with it all though, just a tiny bit:

My top goals for October:

  • Health/Fitness: Gym 3x week and do ab challenge
  • Business: Launch new project and increase email list.
  • Home: Continue to Simplify and Beautify
  • Family: More outdoor time as a group

I don’t exactly have a special focus word for October, but I will use: Grind! Cuz I’m on mines. (yes, MINES)

Scope-tober and Abs-tober are two backup words tho 🙂

I’m doing these two Periscope Challenges:

october-scopers periscope-with-purpose

And I’m also doing this Abs Challenge along with the hot mamas in the free Momshells Facebook Group. Join Us!!!


What’s your #1 Goal for October??


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Happy Birthday To Me!!

happy birthday to me

This post is 19 days late. I’m judging my damn self. LOL

Happy birthday to me anyway dammit. It’s still my birthday month at least.  I celebrated my birthday at Blogalicious this year. It was weird spending my special day away from loved ones but it was worth it, especially since that was my gift to myself.

33 was a big year! I moved from NYC to South Florida and bought a house, got a license and a car and a totally different lifestyle. Automatically winning.

But… my love of lists brings me to this…..

So here’s what I wanted to do before 34. (Remember?)

  1. Move to Florida
  2. Get Driver’s License and fix up my dad’s old car to take to FL
  3. Get into the best shape of my life – see what had happened was…
  4. Get laser hair removal and invisalign treatmenti let my groupon expire accidentally
  5. Have a thriving legit business: blogging/vlogging, coaching and writing (+ speaking?! gulp!)
  6. Save $XXXXX (to savings for Roey and Kaya, and travel fund)
  7. Buy my first home
  8. Be a published author (e-book counts! hehehe)
  9. Have a stronger, more loving and more connected marriage
  10. Have completed my first speaking engagement at a conference (or somewhere else)
  11. Travel to BB Summit, and a blogging conference, and an anniversary trip paying in cash from BB earnings
  12. Be featured somehow (writer, interviewed, profiled, quoted) in online and print publications
  13. Renew my vows with John during our 5th anniversary vacation – we won’t even be in the same state
  14. Publish an ebook – next year!
  15. Do a race / physical competition -obstacle course race perhaps?- of some sort – didn’t even attempt
  16. Start growing my hair out to donate again (get to shoulder length by bday)
  17. Get credentials to move my fitness business forward – nope, maybe next year
  18. Get a new tattoo (or 2) – nope, but I decided what I’m getting and where

Not bad! I crossed off some pretty good stuff! The biggies were crossed off. That means a lot.

I’m going to be 35 next year. That’s a big number. Thir tee five. Lawd. I already told John he’s taking me away for this milestone birthday. What did you do for your last milestone birthday? I’m thinking Costa Rica… but we’ll see. I’ve got a daggone year to decide 🙂

By 35 some of the miracles I will create are: 

  1. Have the house and land improved/renovated
  2. Be in the best shape of my life (have we heard this one before?)
  3. Have a thriving business and earn $xxxxxx by my bday
  4. Be paid to travel internationally
  5. Have an ebook for sale on Amazon
  6. Have an even stronger, loving and connected marriage
  7. Be comfortably homeschooling the kids
  8. Have a more simplified life/lifestyle
  9. Have a new tattoo (or 2)
  10. Be closer to fluent in Spanish
  11. Grow my biz and brand
  12. Have taken a vacay solo (#momcation), one w/ both kids, and another with just John
  13. Have Kaya fully potty trained 🙂
  14. Save $xxxxx to Roey & Kaya’s accounts
  15. Print publication, radio and tv appearances

Do you set birthday goals?

What’s your #1 Goal to achieve by your next birthday?