Rohan Meets Kaya

Roey holds kaya

When Rohan first met Kaya, he was just released from a 1.5 hour car ride, and was at home for the first time in 4 days. He was a wild man. Running here and there, shreiking, pointing at and labeling everything in sight, screaming everyone’s name and hugging everyone.

Except me.

Except the lady holding the baby.

I cried.

My mom guided him over and was like Rohan here’s Kaya, this is your sister. He said: Whoa! Cool! And commenced running, shrieking, pointing and labeling.

I was disappointed.

Later on, when he’d settled in and calmed down to his normal self. He came to me and gave hugs and was all mama mama mama again. He took some long looks at Kaya but didn’t say much or try to touch her. We encouraged him to touch her hand gently, but he wanted no part of it.

When I was changing her, he came over and watched, still silent. But just nodding slowly. This is odd because normally he’s asking questions about everything, touching everything and opening everything. But he just watched tentatively not moving besides nodding.

ro and kai

 

On the second day, he was a little braver. He touched her hand (stole her mitten) and gave her kisses before his nap and before bed. He raced over when she cried, and he calls out for her and waves “hiiiii” in her face. I think he wonders why she doesn’t respond.

Since then he’s been great about her. I have to remind him to be gentle, and watch like a hawk if she’s in her rocker while he’s tornado-ing around the living room. He hears her first when she wakes up, and screams “KAYA FUSSING!” and bounds down the hall and waits for me to catch up. He loves helping, and will get her items for changes, and blankets and whatnot. He loves giving her kisses and hugs and is brazenly touching her, reading to her and showing off his coloring pages to her. lol.

 

Roey Kisses Kaya

HOWEVER…. In general, his behavior has started deteriorating. He’s tantrumming more than ever, and I’m not sure if it’s because of “terrible two” toddlerness, or if it’s Kaya related. Maybe a bit of both. ::shrug::  He’s gotten a few time outs, and boy does he hate that.  Luckily, threatening time outs gets his behavior back on track…usually. (He’s lucky he hasn’t gotten punched in the face yet.)

Overall He’s a great big brother, and loves when we praise him for being one. He’s dealing with a bit of jealousy but he’s such a resilient lil trooper that he’s handling it in stride. Giving him special one on one Roey/Mommy time helps. But, I can’t wait until they can play together.

Any ideas on how to keep making big bro feel extra special?

Kaya Questions and Answers

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I’ve gotten more questions about Kaya in the past 10 days than I ever got when Rohan was born. I’ll try to answer some of them now since lots of people are asking the same questions:

Why Kaya Marie? How’d you pick her name? 

I wanted Kaya for a while…remember? But I wanted to be able to call her Kai cuz I just love that name and John thought just Kai was no good. So we went around with a few names, I wanted either a boy name like Noah or Aedan, or an open “flowy name” like Hannah or Sarah. We had Ananda for a while, and Zahra was also in the running…till Kaya just fit perfect. Rhymes with Maya which is a name I wanted before I ever had kids.

It means different things in different languages but my fave meanings are: Little but wise, and Pure.

Marie is my mom’s middle name so we went with that since Rohan has his great grandfather’s name for his middle.

What is her nickname?

Well, my intention was to call her Kai…but I find myself adding to her name instead of shortening. Kayabear, Kayabelle, Kayabean….etc…  #backwards #whocaresmamasinlove

What color are her eyes?

John wants them to be blue like his. I don’t know what color they’ll end up, but the glassy dark blue color that all newborns seem to have is starting to lift. In my opinion her eyes will be lighter than Rohans, maybe light brown or hazel? ::shrug:: All I know is, I was 100% certain that Rohan’s eyes were going to be dark brown. Kaya’s just don’t have the same look….

ro and kai

How’s Rohan with her?

Going to do a full post on this, but he’s good with her. He freaked out one morning when she didn’t have a hat on and ran to go get one for her. We are working on him being gentle with her and careful around her. He gets so excited and wild…I worry, but I know overall he loves his little sister and just wants to touch her and help her.

Are you breastfeeding her?

But of course! I was nervous that I’d have issues with my milk coming in. It took a little longer than it did the first time. But we’re all good. She’s nursing all the time and my nipples hurt like a sonofagun. A full “Adventures in Breastfeeding” post is coming soon.

How was the c-section?

Horrendous. Brutal. Awful. Scary. ::shudder:: Glad I’m never having more children. Glad Kaya came safe and sound and I made it out OK. But I’ll tell you about that in the birth story.

kaya

Who does she look like?

We have no idea. This lil girl is a shapeshifter. I see John, I see Jack (John’s dad), I see my aunt Mena (My dad’s aunt), I see Rohan, I see my dad, I see….a friendly italian baker named mario….I see the singer Ashanti LOL  We have no clue. She definitely has John’s eyes though. And she has my one right-cheek dimple. We’re going to have to wait and see. Right now I say John’s got claim to this one.

How is John with her?

He treats her like she is the most fragile thing in the world. Watching him change her diaper for the first time (a 25 minute affair) was pure comedy. It’s sweet, but I don’t think it’ll last. He treated Rohan like a dozen eggs for the first few weeks of his life, too. Once that breastmilk started to plump up the limbs he got more comfortable and “normal” with him. I predict the same thing happening with Kaya. I will say, he’s in love with her. I felt like while I was pregnant, he wasn’t as in love with her as he was when Rohan was inside. Less talking to her thru the belly and whatnot. But now that she’s here, he’s properly in love as he should be. I really feel sorry for the little boys that come chasing after her. With her dad, her brother, her uncle and her crazy grampa…This girl is gunna be pissed….but protected lol.

If you have any Kaya Questions send em my way! What questions did you get when your lil ones were born?

More Bang For My Diaper-Buying Buck

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well beginnings diaper review well-beginnings-logo-610x305

We were not flush with cash growing up, but we always had what we needed. My family was always great with money. Spending more on the things they valued, and saving everywhere they could. My mom always taught me to get the most bang for my buck, save, “pay” myself first, but not be such a penny-pincher that you didn’t enjoy what money could buy.

Now that they’ve moved up in financial standing, my mom is all “oh Dan, we must buy it…we’re LOSING money not buying it….” LOL…. but I digress…

I’m grateful for the financial lessons I was taught growing up, both by observation, and implicit lessons. I’m now able to balance John’s different way of viewing money and spending, and I know my children will learn to be good and balanced with money too. Being smart with our money leads us to be more open to trying different brands of products and happily we tend to find new fave brands that are often cheaper than our old faves!

You guys already know, I’ve got one lil poop monster and another mini poop monster on the way. I’m working at home, heavily pregnant, pinching our pennies, and my time is limited. Everything I can do to get more bang for my buck is essential. I’m open to all.

 

well beginnings diaper image

 

The Well Beginnings diapers are one of the “bang for buck” products I use. Easy to pick up at the Walgreens around the corner, and easy on my wallet and budget too.

More importantly, they work well, stay dry on Roey’s butt after pee, and holds up well overnight. I used to use them when Roey was younger and my only gripe was that they weren’t as soft and snuggly as other brands. But now that Roey’s bigger I’m not concerned with the softness as much. They’re soft enough, surprisingly thin yet hold a good amount without being soaky.  My fave part is they fit him well and he’s a mover and a shaker and they hold up!

I’m glad I’ve got another brand of diaper in my arsenal of “go-to” brands. Good thing I was open to finding one that was more bang for my buck!

Have you discovered any new brands you like recently?

well beginnings diaper review

I Miss Breastfeeding

i miss breastfeeding

::sigh:: Girls, I miss breastfeeding.

Everyone says you’ll miss being pregnant once you have your baby.

They’re filthy liars.

What you never hear (or at least I’ve never heard) is that you’ll miss nursing.

I can’t believe how much I miss breastfeeding Roey. If I pass by a photo in my old breastfeeding blog posts or album on the computer of him nursing I get this pang in my chest of straight up longing.

I miss it.

I miss the closeness of it, the feelings of value I derived from it, and I miss seeing the cute lil nursing face he made.

I really miss the magical sleep-inducing effect of it too! Sometimes when he’s running around like the cray cray toddler that he is, I wish I could just pop a magic boob in his mouth and have him pass out 10 minutes later.

silly baby

I’m ready for BabyH2.0 to get here so I can nurse again. I know that first 4-6 weeks is going to be super painful and sucky, and I’m prepared for it. But after the nipples are healed up, it’s going to be glorious.

I’m re-reading my fave breastfeeding book in preparation. Fingers crossed that baby girl is a good latcher like her guzzlegut brother was.

Only 5 more weeks and I’ll get to start again!

Did you miss breastfeeding too?

FYI – I am ALL in my feelings, so this week, you’re gunna be all in my feelings too! LOL. Lots of “mommy diary” type posts like this one, talking to you girls about my pre-2nd baby thoughts. – YOU. HAVE. BEEN. WARNED.

9 Ways To Stay Sane in the 3rd Trimester

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I’m huge. I’m tired. I’m 6 weeks away from a baby. I’m going insane, but am trying to pretend I’ve got it all together. ;)

However, in a moment of clarity some great ideas came to me on how to make the 3rd trimester a more pleasant one. Let’s not go crazy before babies gets here, they’ll drive you insane in due time. *side eye to my toddler* These are just ways to make it through in an easy way….

1. Get a hobby

Now, I’m not talking about anything strenuous or requiring a lot of training, tools, or expertise. I’m talking about something simple like learning to knit or crochet, or doing crossword puzzles. Something simple, stationary, and fun that will still offer you some stimulation.

2. Start a low key project

Again…key word here is low key. Maybe you already crochet, and can start on a new blanket for baby, or there are some small art projects you want to complete for the nursery. Small projects are great because you get a sense of satisfaction upon completion without having to expend too much, time or physical or mental energy….both of which are limited in trimester 3.

3. Begin meditation

You can find some guided meditations for free on youtube, or go hardcore zen meditation on your own. Meditating has a zillion benefits (full post on this later) and will help you feel more centered, calm, and prepared for baby. You can simply sit or lay down and focus on your breathing, in and out for a few minutes and benefit from it. Don’t worry about any of the thoughts flying in and out of your mind. Let them come and go as they please.

4. Write to your baby

This is a fave of mine. When I’m procrastinating on something, or just need something to do so I don’t go nuts, I take to the keyboard and write my unborn daughter (and toddler son) letters. I get filled with feelings of love, and excitement, and also feelings of satisfaction of what I’ve created for them down the road.

5. Read on motherhood/baby care

When I was in my 3rd trimester with my son I read ALL DAY LONG on motherhood and baby care and breastfeeding. Now, I’m reading here and there on parenting strategies, gentle discipline (cuz apparently punching my kids in the face is not an option) and re-reading my breastfeeding books. Reading helps you feel more prepared and capable. SUPER important if you’re pregnant with your first!

6. Take classes

There are baby care classes, breastfeeding classes, mommy skills classes…take your pick. You’ll enjoy learning new things and feel more competent about your impending motherhood.

7. Disengage from reality

Have a TV binge and watch 8 seasons of a show in a week, or a book binge and just submerge yourself in someone else’s world for a while. This helps time pass in those last l-o-n-g weeks, and is nice to get your mind off of baby preparations for a while. I devoured loads of novels and TV shows I’d never heard of in my last weeks of pregnancy with my first.

8. Work out

If you are allowed by your doc, working out is great to improve your mood, energy level and overall well being. I wish I could have worked out during my pregnancies. I would’ve probably been a lot more sane. Prenatal yoga is a great option for the 3rd trimester when other forms of exercise may seem too taxing.

9. Pamper yourself

Get a prenatal massage, get your hair or nails done, get a facial or another skin service done. It’s great to get pampered at any time, but during your 3rd trimester when you’re uncomfortable, tired, feeling whale-like and can’t see your feet…it’s especially nice.

What not to do in your third trimester:

  • move to a new house
  • take on a new client
  • fight with your spouse over everything
  • hide under the covers pretending the world doesn’t exist
  • see how much your toddler will fetch for sale on the black market
  • run (waddle, really) away from home and never go back

Not that I did any of those things….

Any ideas for a more pleasant 3rd Trimester?

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