We Really Do Not Need Stretch Marks

no-thank-you

Dear Universe: We don’t need stretch marks! Stop giving them to us dammit! Sincerely, Striped Mothers Everywhere

::sigh::

My stretch marks make my belly look seriously fugly.

I know some women don’t care, or want to view their stretch marks as “battle scars” and say they “earned them” etc.

side-eye-prince-2

Whatever.

Not for me.

I wish they weren’t there.

After Rohan there were some, and I didn’t mind them one bit!

Now after Kaya there are a million evil, jagged, zig zaggy devil stripes all around my middle and I can’t stand them.

I read a post on Blogher bashing women who said their stretch marks ruined their stomachs, and that their baby ruined their body etc.

The post was going in on these women, as if they were not allowed to feel this way simply because the scars were caused by a baby.

How I feel about my marks has nothing to do with how I feel about my babies.

tumblr_lm0fgcLEQy1qdlkgg

Don’t even know how that flawed logic came about….

Yes, the human body is miraculous. Yes growing a person inside you and then popping them out to live among us is the most awe inspiring, amazing, affirming things…. ever.

But you know what would be even more amazing?

More miraculous?

If the human body could do all that magical stuff…. and….. not leave stretch marks behind.

Yup.

I mean, why not?

If our bodies are capable of this level of magic, why not just sprinkle a lil extra magic in and have zero stretch marks or extra fat deposits?

We don’t need any “proof” of pregnancy left behind. We have the child for that.

You know what?

I’m gunna leave this very important post in God’s suggestion box just in case he gets around to it….maybe after ending world hunger.

Women of the future will thank me, I’m sure.

jesus fix it

::stalks away hoitily::

What very important issue are you going to put in God’s suggestion box?

And did you do anything to lighten your stretch marks?

PiYo DEFINE YOURSELF
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Mom of two, Wife, Life & Wellness Coach, Blogger, Writer, Laughter lover, Motivator, Quasi Health Nut, Vacation Addict, Hair Care Junkie, Beach Bum Wannabe. Writes about parenting, wellness, and marriage here and on other sites.

About Dani

Mom of two, Wife, Life & Wellness Coach, Blogger, Writer, Laughter lover, Motivator, Quasi Health Nut, Vacation Addict, Hair Care Junkie, Beach Bum Wannabe.
Writes about parenting, wellness, and marriage here and on other sites.

  • AprilD

    You’re too funny and I hope He answers you before my time comes (if it does)!

  • http://guyanesesista.com guyanesesista

    I’m throwing in stretch marks in the suggestion box as well. I ain’t got kids yet but I’m not looking forward to future stretchmarks.

  • http://www.lovemylonglegs.com/ Sheri “Love my Long Legs”

    I am throwing my fist up in the air because I feel what you are saying. If you do ever hear of anything that can get rid of these tire tracks from hell, PLEASE let me know.

  • Peg T

    LOL, you are too funny girl. I hear you on the stretch marks but I must say it’s not just a pregnancy thing. One of my coworker who is 50 with no kids made me laugh one day, she said that she always thought that she would be rocking a bikini until she died because she didn’t have any kids but somehow that’s not the case. At least you have a great excuse for why you have them I guess.

    I am not above getting a tummy tuck or whatever is needed to get my body back if I feel like it :)

  • http://lashawnwiltz.com/ Rose’s Daughter

    stretch marks….are evil…. #thatisall

  • http://bloggingwhilenursing.com KalleyC @BloggingWhileNursing

    Girl, you are too funny! I hear you on the stretch marks. While I don’t hate them, I don’t love them either. I guess I’m indifferent to them since I’ve had stretch marks before children.

  • Ashlei H.

    I have had some luck with dudu osun black soap! It has stellar reviews on amazon for healing scars. I have been using it religiously for two months now and it has decreased the appearance of my stretch marks. I’m going to keep hope alive and cont. using it but sadly, I don’t think anything will make them go away completely. *sigh*

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