OK.

I said it.  It’s out now.

Cannot take it back.

I have contracted an illness that has no cure.  I’ll just have to wait out the effects.

::sigh::

Women who transition from permed or relaxed hair back to their natural hair have a similar ailment that strikes them once their new growth comes in.  It’s called HIF disease.  Hand In Fro.

I’ve contracted HOB disease.  Hand On Belly.

Seriously, I cannot stop rubbing this beach ball of mine!

It’s a sickness.

I’m ’bout to rub the skin clean off!

All of the guys in my office have “caught” me at some point just sitting at my desk looking down and rubbing my bump.  I quickly straighten up and start to look busy, as if I was caught doing something really bad.  And they quickly look away like that too! Ha!!  (I’m gunna need these guys to start taking heavier steps so I can hear them coming!)

At home, I realize I’ve turned into an Al Bundy-esque character, whenever sitting or laying down, but instead of wedging my hands in my pants they automatically go to the belly and gets ta rubbin.’

I love to just rub and rub, whether Embry’s active or not.  And I do it not even realize I’m doing it sometimes too. It’s compulsive.

But seeing as I’ve gone from this:

to this:

With way more to go!

I feel like, how could I not rub?!  It’s like a magical hand magnet that represents the miracle this universe is and everything good in my world right now.

I’ve got HOB, and I like it!!

What is it about a pregnant belly that makes it a hand magnet?

Oh my lil Embry is 7 months along.  I’m so proud of him for growing big and strong in there.  He loves the sound of his daddy’s voice, going bazerk whenever John comes near. And when for some reason he pushes himself up as far as he can go so that my lower belly is totally flat, I can’t breathe and my ribs are about to break, he likes me to sing a certain song and some rubbing to get him to chill out and go back down where he won’t suffocate mama. If I sing a different song and rub he stays up there! RUDE! (If you know the musical bye bye birdie, it’s the “we love you conrad” song, but of course I replace conrad w/ his name) He’s super active and he’s very diligent about practicing his karate in there every day.  John has started playing classical music for him….which I think makes him fall asleep.

How Far Along? 28 Weeks 2 days! 12 (ish) weeks to go!

Symptoms: Heartburn’s the worst.  Also sadly in a great deal of pain when walking, and cramping up a bit

Total Weight Gain/Loss: At one point last week I was up 20lbs! Somehow that’s dropped back down to 17. Whatevs.

Maternity Clothes: all day!

Stretch Marks: Not yet, still fighting stretchmarks as best I can. Using my lotions and potions to lube up real good each day.

Sleep: When i’m dreaming it’s great. When I lay down and lose my breath and have a coughing fit. Nog great.  When I wake up in the night to turn over and it takes me 10 minutes, not so great.

Food Cravings: sandwiches, wings, pizza, ramen, easy mac, soda (yes, I realize my palate has regressed to that of a college stoner)

Best Moment This Week: I think my best moment is every day when I watch embry make my stomach go crazy, and when i push and he pushes back. 

Movement: TONS, all the time. As for my movement…i’m one slow wobbly heffa.

Labor Signs: cramping

Belly Button In Or Out? Whenever I think about it this song comes to mind.

What I Miss:  Feeling “normal” – having energy, being able to move quickly and without pain

What I Am Looking Forward To: Doc appointment on Thursday, also, I’ve started a countdown to full term. (62 days!) and we move in 2 weeks…looking forward to setting up my lil man’s room!

Milestones: 3rd trimester!! 7 “months” along. Feels great.  I’m so proud of my lil boy!

Weekly Wisdom: Delegate, delegate, delegate!

Any advice for me at this stage in pregnancy?

and in case you’re wondering, NO, I didn’t wear this ghastly ill fitting shirt to work, it’s just that today’s outfit conceals the belly a bit.  See?  (I still look pregnant from the front tho!! YAY)

So, next week makes 7 “months” and 3rd trimester.  Okay, I have this app on my phone called “I’m Expecting” and it gives weekly updates just like babycenter and the others, but yesterday I checked it and it said “Congratulations! This week officially marks the beginning of the third trimester!”

What gives?

How Far Along? 27 Weeks 1 day! 13 (ish) weeks to go! I am excited to be almost into my 3rd trimester! 

Symptoms: Oh what a moody, moody heifer I am.  The heartburn is horrendous, so I’ve given up on TUMS and moved on to something stronger and more long lasting.  My cramping and pelvis pain is still pretty bad, but me not complaining about it daily is going pretty well. This new thing of where I lay down and every organ seems to come running up into my neck to have a party there has started, I choke/cough/cant breathe and have to sit right back up, and s-l-o-w-l-y lay back down.  That can’t be normal, can it? 

Total Weight Gain/Loss: 16 lbs gained!  Little man is about 14.4 inches and weighs about 2 pounds! My belly is growing and I’m feeling heavier! Oh, and I look pregnant from the front instead of just bloated! 

Maternity Clothes: Nothing has changed here.  All maternity items except 2 pre-preggo jeans that I wear with a belly band.  My aunt suggested I buy one of those maternity girdle belly support thingys.  I think I’m going to.  Anything to make the belly not feel so heavy would be great! Got any recommendations? 

Stretch Marks: Not yet, still fighting stretchmarks as best I can. Using my lotions and potions to lube up real good each day.

Sleep: Some days sleep comes easily, but doesn’t last.  Other days it doesn’t come easy but I’ll sleep through the night.  I’m still loving the crazy vivid dreams.  Last night I was breastfeeding Embry in one of my dreams…again he was a girl…he’s always a girl in my dreams…and he was SO tiny… I mean like….10 inches long like a lil dolly.  

Food Cravings: Spicy spicy spicy.  And iced cream.  And bagels still.  I now have an aversion…tomatoes and tomato sauces.  Just the thought of them makes me feel a bit ill.

Best Moment This Week: Reading an email I got in response to the body issues post, realizing I’m almost at 3rd trimester, visiting the hospital, it was great, and I’m excited to give birth there now.

Movement: I love how active Embry is.  He “answers” John and I.  We love it.  I love responding to him with words and him talking back with kicks.  I’ll let him make decisions for me too, lol.  “Embers, do you want a bagel or pineapples?” Kick once for bagel, flip around for pineapples.  (He loves bagels )

Labor Signs: none! and I don’t want any until after 37 weeks!

Belly Button In Or Out?  Still 1/2 out, I wonder if it’ll go out any more.  The belly is growing but it’s staying half out like a pout.

What I Miss:  Being in better control of my emotions/tears.  Comfortable sleep and a life without heartburn.  

What I Am Looking Forward To: Moving to the new place so I can start up on Embry’s nursery, Finding a doula (this is proving to be quite hard with our budget), doing a maternity photo shoot. 

Milestones: Looking pregnant from the front feels like a milestone for me.  Also making the decision on birthing center vs L&D unit at my hospital. 

Weekly Wisdom:  I have to remember to be gentle with myself and also that I cannot move as fast as I think I can.

Any advice for me at this stage in pregnancy?