Vegas, Cheapskate Style!

September 30, 2011 by 8 Comments

OK well, not really cheapskate or we wouldn’t be going at all…or we’d go and be eating frozen meals in our hostel on skid row sharing a bathroom with random other travelers.

Last time we were in Vegas we got married and had a whirlwind weekend, driving straight from the airport to the marriage license bureau to dinner w/ my inlaws.  Whew!  It was the craziest, most emotional, most amazingly wonderful weekend of my life!

When we first started planning this trip, I was all…It’s our first anniversary we have to do it BIG!  We’re staying at encore or cosmo, and we’re renting a cool car, and we’re eating at the best places, and we’re doing a pool party and we’re gambling all over town and and and and and…..

And…no.

Reality time, Dan.  We’re doing this vacay on a budget since we have so much to save for and now have a destination wedding in February to attend so that’s more $$.

Ummm can I just say….I LOVE VEGAS!!! And I’m so excited and grateful to have an anniversary trip there!!  My head has been in the clouds for the last couple weeks with vegas on the brain.

Vegas Vacation Goals:

  • come back richer than I arrived
  • enjoy my anniversary
  • find a way to surprise John with something (i’m totally stumped here!)
  • take lots of pics w/ John
  • take photos in the canyons
  • find crapless craps somewhere (best game!)
  • avoid shopping, avoid outlets, do not step away from John in the fashion show mall
  • work out at least once, dammit

Airfare:

Instead of paying $800, I used my miles and our flights are $10 total. You can’t beat that…wait…yes you could…if they were first class seats for $10 it’d be amaaaazing.  But I’m happy with the deal!!  John’s poor long legs wont be too happy about being squished, but…I’ll remind him that his flight was $5 and that should ease the pain…. a lil.

(this can’t be real, right?  The armrest is taking his virginity!)

Hotel:

We’re staying at The Orleans.  We’ve gambled and eaten there in the past, and it has great reviews on Tripadvisor, but we usually stay at higher star level places (through priceline!).  I’m sure it’ll be great though, and we saved about $300 off the price of the Hard Rock that I originally had booked.  Total for 6 nights $450 (including tax/resort fee)  (And I get 4% cashback from mr. rebates!)

I stalked travelzoo, otel, and a bunch of other sites until I latched on to this deal.  Hooters was cheaper by a bit, but had pretty bad reviews.  There was a downtown hotel for $188 for 6 nights!!! But it had one star, bad reviews and looked like it was on the set of a horror film. (I admit I did consider it for a minute…..or two…. the $188 was so tempting.)

Car:

We always rent a car in Vegas, I just cant do it with the cabs and tram thing…Those cabs really add up!  The best full size car deals I found was through car companies I’d never heard of in my life.  But have decent reviews: Fox and Payless.  I like Paying Less so it’s a go for me!  $195 total for 7 days no matter which we choose.

Food:

Well…I spent a total of $11 on $250 worth of coupons on restaurant.com during their 90% off sale.  (Actually I spent $8.25 if you consider the mr.rebates cash back I’ll get on the purchase)  So we’re definitely eating at the 7 restaurants we purchased coupons for, including Border Grill, Stripsteak and Fleur.

And we’ll also visit our fave dinner buffet at Bellagio, but otherwise we’ll be eating on the cheap. We usually go to a buffet in one of the casinos for breakfasts, but we’re going to do IHOP or some similar cheapie spot and eat for less than 1/2 the price of the buffets.  Also the Orleans buffet is inexpensive too so we’ll try that.

In&Out burger is in Vegas so conceivably all of John’s meals are taken care of if we really want to go cheapie.

I found THIS LINK that has all the deal food specials in Vegas.  I remember being so proud of myself after eating my $5.99 steak and lobster dinner the first time we went to Vegas.  I was expecting a crap steak and lobster the consistency of rubber, but was pleasantly surprised that everything was yummy.

We also tried a $0.99 shrimp cocktail that made me want to die….so….not every deal was a winner.  Though the fried oreos I had afterward made up for the gross shrimp.

Gaming:

I love craps!!  I try to play at $5 tables, and sometimes $10 but we’re only going to do the $5 tables and play where we get matchplays, or happy hours (like 5-7pm at the Westin where roulette – a game i hate and never play, is only 50 cents and craps is $2!), and the downtown hotels with lower limits.

Cosmopolitan is having a $100 freeplay promotion where if you lose your $100 buy in, you get it back!….So we’ll definitely go there.  We know if we lose we get our buy in back, and if we win, WE WIN!

Also going to get the players card at every casino we visit so we can get the funbook coupons :) ::sigh:: i love coupons!

Excursions/Free Fun:

We love to hike in the canyons out there so that’ll be our fun free activity in the mornings.I also found THIS LINK of some of the free sights in town so we’ll go do a few, I definitely want to go see the animals, and watch the fountain show again, and visit freemont street for the light show there.  We’ll also be lazy by the pool a lot too…if weather lets us.

We’ll do a “real” (read: overpriced!) excursion when John’s Bro and SIL and his friend and wife join us.  We’re thinking ATVs or something else active and off-strip.
I’ve been keeping my eyes on the vegas yipit for all the coupons/deals I can find.

Shows:

We only see shows we can get tickets to at the 1/2 price ticket booths like Tix4tonight.  Instead of seeing a show every night we’re just going to do two or three.  One will be a cirque du soleil show and one will be Penn & Teller cuz John likes them, and not sure about the 3rd (if there will even be a third.)

Nightlife: No clue yet.  But we’re only going to bars/lounges with free entry.  Not going to any of the “hot” trendy places….with these guys….

FYI: I google-imaged “guidos dancing” to get this pic….please google it and enjoy your findings….also check out guidosblog.com… Look for the Swedos!  You’ll like it.

Shopping: None.  *Gulp*  That saves a lot right there!!

Soooo….that’s the plan.  I’m not even shopping before this trip for vacation clothes (that’s a big deal) and I’m not doing my lil “oops John, I forgot to pack my conditioner” trick so I have an excuse to go bucknuts in the hair section of walmart.  I’m saving my pennies dammit!!

I can’t wait to head out west and see the mountains, feel the warmth, and hear the dingalingalingaling of the casinos.  In my head I’m already there….

Are you headed anywhere this fall/winter?  Any must-do things in Vegas that you’d recommend? Any FREE things to do in Vegas that you’d recommend?

Filed Under: Money Honey, My Life, Travel

Shell Game

September 29, 2011 by 8 Comments

In an attempt to make you forget what a bad blogger I’m being, I present to you some funnies:

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn’t leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns

Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma’s a bitch.
Sincerely,
The Titanic

Dear J.K. Rowling,
Your books are entirely unrealistic.. I mean, a ginger kid with two
friends?
Sincerely,
Anonymous

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada

Dear Yahoo,
I’ve never heard anyone say, “I don’t know, let’s Yahoo! it…” just
saying…
Sincerely,
Google

Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF
happened?!
Sincerely,
1985

Dear Windshield Wipers,
Can’t touch this.
Sincerely,
That Little Triangle

Dear Rose,
There was definitely room on that Door for the both of us.
Sincerely,
Jack
PS, you let go

Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea… Just kidding! They’re all dead.
Sincerely,
BP

Dear Saturn,
I liked it, so I put a ring on it.
Sincerely,
God

Dear Fox News,
So far, no news about foxes.
Sincerely,
Unimpressed

Dear Michael Jackson,
You really should have became a Catholic Priest. The pay isn’t great,
but the benefits….
Sincerely,
The Pope

Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,
Please lknvfdmv.xvn.
Sincerely,
Stevie Wonder

Dear Nickleback,
That’s enough.
Sincerely,
The World

Dear Scissors,
I feel your pain…..no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely,
Sarah Palin

Dear Mary,
Just admit that you slept with someone else. This is getting out of
hand.
Sincerely,
Joseph –

Dear Osama Bin Laden,
Marco….
Sincerely,
United States

Dear World of Warcraft,
Thank you for ensuring my son’s virginity.
Sincerely,
Parents Everywhere

Dear Anne Frank,
Two can play this game….
Sincerely,
Waldo

Dear Batman,
What was your power again?
Sincerely,
Superman

Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely,
Nail Salon Ladies

Dear Global Warming,
You’re the best imaginary friend ever!
Sincerely,
Al Gore

Dear Ugly People,
You’re welcome.
Sincerely,
Alcohol

Dear Mr. Gump
WTF are you talking about? There’s a little diagram on the lid that
tells you EXACTLY what you’re gonna get….
Sincerely,
Jenny

Dear Katy Perry,
I liked the kiss too.
Sincerely,
Justin Beiber

Dear Haiti,
Is it too early to ask what’s shakin’?
Sincerely,
Seriously Going To Hell

Dear Martin Luther King Jr.
I have a dream within a dream within a dream within another dream….
What now?
Sincerely,
Leonardo Di Caprio

Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendar ends there because
some Spanish d-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?
Sincerely,
The Mayans

Dear Snooki,
GET BACK TO WORK!
Sincerely,
Willy Wonka

Dear iPhone,
Please stop spellchecking all of my rude words into nice words. You
piece of shut.
Sincerely,
Every iPhone User

Dear Giant Spider on the Wall,
Please die. Please die. Please die. Please die. CRAP! Where did you go?
Sincerely,
Terrified

Dear Trash,
At least you get picked up…
Sincerely,
The Girls of Jersey Shore

Dear Man,
It’s cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant

Dear Dr. Phil,
Look man, there’s only room for one fake doctor in this world and I was
here first.
Sincerely,
Dr. Pepper

One of my bosses sent these to me a while back.  It still makes me giggle.
Did you giggle?

Which one is your fave?

 

Filed Under: My Life

An Evil Mickey Story

September 23, 2011 by 13 Comments

I figured since I mentioned my disgusting rodent infestation, I should at least be a good friend and tell you the whole story.  If by some chance you thought I was a reasonable, logical human being who behaved normally….I’d like to dispell that notion for you right now and show you my crazy.

Rewind to November 2008, I was living alone in a different apartment (in a slightly sketchier part of town) and I saw a mouse pop out of a hole in my floor where the radiator pipe comes through.  I shreiked like a man, jumped up on the couch and continued screaming.  The mouse zoomed back down the hole.  I started crying, felt violated, and called my dad’s cell phone.  He picked up sounding sleepy (i glanced at the clock, it was almost midnight….oops) “Dad I have a mouse in my house come get it come kill it!!”  His response:  “I’m in Florida, call John.”  ::click:

Well, I did call John, and he refused to come save me from the beast.  Granted it was midnight, and he was in Jersey….but still.  I was scared.  I kept seeing the animal crawling on me and biting me.   I was going to have to sleep with this creature lurking around every corner.  The next day John came over with steel wool and some other crap and plugged up the hole.  My hero.

I moved out of that apartment the same month.

Yes, I totally ran away from a mouse.

Fast forward to my most recent mousecapade….  It’s about 9pm.  John had just left for work.  I’m innocently sitting at the kitchen table writing and I think I see something moving out the corner of my eye.  I dismissed it until I saw the brazen devilmouse pop out from behind my garbage can!!!  I think it was the same one from my old apartment. hehe

My heart stopped.  I screamed and jumped up on the chair I was sitting in.  I think I said “SHOO!”  as if it would listen.  I don’t know how long I was standing up there…but…I didn’t see it again.  I sat back down, on the verge of tears and feeling violated once again.  I went back to writing and heard rustling.  I looked for a weapon. I threw one of John’s books in the direction I heard the rustling.

Nothing happened.

I called John.  The convo was something like..

Me: ::sob:: come home now there’s a rat in here

John: A rat?

Me: Yes a rat and I’m scared come home now and kill it.

John: I can’t come home I’ll be late for work just relax

Me: I CANT RELAX! There’s a RAT in here!!!!wail moan sob cray wail again

John: I’ll get it in the morning.

Me: Noooo Whyyyyyyy (read that in the most whiney voice you can muster)

John: Danielle!!

Me: Fine!!! :click:

Then I stomped over to my keys (because stomping would scare the devilmouse and he won’t come out to climb on me…clearly), put on my sneakers and ran out of that hellhole.

Yes, I fled from a rodent a second time. 

I stayed at my parents’ house for 2 weeks (not because of the mouse lol, I was staying w/ my brother while ‘rents went away) and I monitored the mouseactivity through John during the whole time.    He saw it once…but never again.

When I came home there were sticky traps and mouse poison thingys ALL OVER the apartment.  We haven’t seen the rodent since, but every creak I hear I feel like it’s him….waiting until I sleep so he can come crawl on me and bite me.

Hasn’t happened yet though.  ::shrug::

The end.

Happy Friday girls!! Have a great weekend!!

Filed Under: My Life

I Want to Move

September 22, 2011 by 4 Comments

No, I need to move.

1. I saw a mouse

2. I saw a mouse

3. Our place is tiny and growing tinier day by day.

4. I saw a f%$#ing mouse!

OK.  I’m officially sick of apartment living.  SICK OF IT I SAY!!!  Outside of the size of our place, which honestly, is decent…until I’m annoyed…then it’s a closet… I am sick of hearing my neighbors play king of the hill reruns ALL goddamn day and night, I’m sick of smelling my neighbor’s food..even though it smells good and garlicky, I’m sick of having a view of a wall, and last but definitely not least: I’m sick of not being able to prevent rodent infestations!

OK, maybe infestation is not the word….but I feel like we’re being penalized for someone else’s filthiness.  And I’m distraught and seeking compensation for my pain and suffering for having to see mickey’s ugly cousin scurry in my kitchen.  ::shudder:: Everyone says “oh that’s just the way it is in an apartment….or…”oh that’s just city life”…..I don’t give a damn. I want out.

Sooo…..Anybody wanna loan me a down payment on a house?  I don’t need much, $50K will do :)

Seriously though, John and I have definitely outgrown this apartment.  And even though it’s adorable with it’s hardwood floors and exposed brick, I believe we need to find a new place that will accommodate us better.  Our current space has a combo kitchen/living room, and then the bedroom, this huge closet and the bathroom.  There’s no real “escape” from each other in this apartment.

Look, this was us just last night:

We’re seriously considering moving into the apartment John’s mom has in her two family house.  There we’d have two bedrooms, one huge ass closet, a living room, a kitchen, and another smaller room for an office.  We’d likely pay her the same as what we’re paying here though. A bonus would be built in part-time child care when Baby H arrives.

In my heart of hearts I hope to find a place paying less, especially since it’ll be outside of Manhattan.  When I look at places in Queens, Brooklyn, Jersey City….they’re the same rental rates as in the city! That’s madness.

Well, I’m on the hunt…cross your fingers for us!

Have you moved recently?  Was it easy to find a place?

Filed Under: Money Honey, My Life

A Crackhead Story

September 21, 2011 by 14 Comments

I gotta tell you this…

About a month or two ago, a little shrunken, wrinkley old lady came to my door.  She had her head and eyes lowered and told me a story:

“There was a tragedy, the Martinez boy in the next building passed away this morning.  He was 5 years old and he got electrocuted.”

Me: *GASP* OMG what happened?

“He touched the back of the family’s TV and his hands were wet.”

Me:

At this point I realized she was not some gossiping old lady, but someone trying to hit me up for cash…I said:  That’s terrible.

She goes: “So we’re going around the neighborhood collecting what we can to help her bury her son.”

This is where she raised her face/eyes to me and I noticed her mouth was devoid of teeth and her mustache was thicker than John’s (and somehow jet black though her hair was gray)….

*gag*

Anyway…I apologized, told her I didn’t carry cash but was happy to donate online with my credit card if there was a website or something set up…..

I couldn’t even get my sentence out before she rolled her eyes and walked away.

Fast forward to last night:

Guess who knocked on my door!!!

I recognized this crackhead shyster immediately, but I guess all the crack made her forget she’s visited my door before.  She gave me the same exact story about that poor Martinez boy!  I had to start laughing, I told her, I remember this story from the last time he died and she said “Thank You!” and scurried away.  HAHHAA

WTF?!!

I’m laughing even as I write this.  You can’t make these things up folks.

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