I Am Not That Girl

I have come to terms with it, and I’m 100% okay knowing that I’m not, nor will I ever be, that girl.

The girl you see walking down the street with flawless makeup, her eye shadows blended so perfectly, her lashes attached just so, her lipstick poppin’, cheeks all blushed out, her foundation flawlessly smoothed and blended…ugh!

I just can’t.

And I have no desire to try anymore.

I used to get so frustrated when I took painstaking time to follow the instructions in makeup books, from makeup artists, from youtubers, to a T….only to end up looking like:

I’d always set goals to get “more girly” and equating perfect makeup application with that.  I think every year I set resolutions to wear makeup daily, and get good at applying it and whatnot.  And every year I fail.

Uh uh. No mas.

Those youtube gurus, and those millions of beauty/makeup blogs, all the how-tos in the world cannot help me.  And I’m not even upset about it anymore.  I give up.  I surrender.

Now I’m not saying I’m gunna walk around with caterpillar brows and a mustache or just not take care of myself aesthetically anymore.  I’ll still beautify myself, and put my best face forward, but I’m just surrendering to the real me.

The me that realizes she’s still a feminine girly girl even without nicely blended earth-toned shadows over primer.  The me that values extra sleep or “me time” in the morning versus taking that time to ‘put on my face.’  The natural me that’s been persisting all these years despite my wackadoodle idea that I need to be made up in order to be pretty and polished.

I give props to those women who can so artfully make themselves up.  It’s a skill and an art.  It’s admirable and it’s beautiful.

But, I’m just a mascara, liner and lip gloss girl, (on a good day) and I’m okay with that. 

Why did it take me 28 years to be fine with it?  ::shrug::

Are you a makeup diva?  Or a barefaced beauty? Have you always been good at it?

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Mom of two, Wife, Life & Wellness Coach, Blogger, Writer, Laughter lover, Motivator, Quasi Health Nut, Vacation Addict, Hair Care Junkie, Beach Bum Wannabe. Writes about parenting, wellness, and marriage here and on other sites.


  1. ~EssenseVibez~ says

    NO YOU DIDN'T USE THE WESLEY SNIPES SHOT!!!—lol–good lawddddd—you crack'd me up with that one–to answer your question i use light foundation, eyeliner/eyebrow pencil and vaseline/chapstick on my lips—growing up at the age of 18, i thought i had it going on wearing {trying} to wear makeup and my then husband told me, "you need to stop tryin' to look like everyone else."–that threw me off so i decided to be me–it wasn't until i was in my 30's that i stopped wearing "mucho makeup–now at the age of soon to be 48, i'm lovin' the simplicity of wearing less–plus it saves time–you need a whuppin' for postin' wesley—ROOOOOOOFLLLLLLLLLL
    {that was dynomite flick tho}—remain blessed gurl!!!

  2. ~EssenseVibez~ says

    hold up lemme clear the air—my now husband was my then boyfriend–yeah, after i read that i was "wuuuuuuuuut???"–we've been together since i was 17 and he was 18–now we're seeing each other grow old–i've accepted the random smells, the arguing and the fact that we can still get it on {if you know what i mean}–okay i just wanted to clear the age thing up—peacE.

  3. Holley says

    I am so with you on this. I though have never been into the whole make up thing, I dont even try. I occasionally wear make up if I want to look cute or something but it is definitely NOT an every day thing. So, barefaced beauty here. I don't know why this has never been important to me, I've been blessed with great skin i suppose. I mean, I had nicely shaped eyebrows but now i get them done. But You know I guess I just feel confident in the way I look without make up enough to not feel like it's something I cant leave home wearing. I personally think I look weird with make up on. Less pretty. I dunno. I'm definitely an au naturale kinda girl!

  4. Brittany says

    You are STUNNING! Make up or no make up!

    I HAVE to wear make up. I might not be good at it.. but I need foundation, blush, mascara, eyeliner, and lip gloss! DAILY! Lol

  5. Dani @ OK, Dan says

    I'm with you, Anonymous.

    Essence – you are HYSTERICAL! Aren't ya glad hubby loved the natural you!?

    Holley – oh you're so lucky to have great skin! Mine is a mess, but I'm workin on it. I get what you mean about the "less pretty" kinda thing. For me it's just "less Dani" kinda.

    Brittany – thanks!! so are you, and so is your adorable little man! Do you ever go out w/o makeup?

  6. *~1 LadyLena 6~* says

    I'm a barefaced beauty myself…I do like experimenting with a little makeup for special occasions but even then I barely use anything. I don't think you need makeup like that- trust me, I've seen girls that NEED their makeup. I take it as a blessing that I don't need to cover up before walking out of the house. I am very lazy, haha.

  7. Mrs.Vid says

    I don't waste my time trying to make myself up. They way I see it if someone doesn't like me with a bare face then they're not worth liking me with makeup. I do put make up on daily but my morning make up routine takes about 10-15 min max! If we're going out and I want to look nice then I'll spend an extra few minutes to play up my eyes but that's about it! :) I know girls that you wouldn't recognize if they didn't have their full make up on and you passed them on the street.. Not appealing to me!

  8. Dani @ OK, Dan says

    Lady Lena – I'm not sure anyone really needs it. But it definitely is an awesome tool to enhance or mask things. I'm lazy too lol I hear you 100% Did you ever wear makeup full-time?

    Ms Vid – See that's scary, if you put on so much makeup that you are unrecognizable without it, that's a problem! Did you ever wear makeup full-time?

  9. Dani @ OK, Dan says

    Hey Hydra! *MUAH* Why you puttin my business out on the street! lol. (u of all people know the only thing i know about makeup is a "smokey eye")

  10. Autumn says

    What a great blog! You are so honest and it is great for us to hear it because it is way hard for so many ladies to come to terms with their own beauty. As I near.. ahem 30… and live in the desert, I am a daily tinted sunscreen gal with a touch of mascara and spf lip gloss. Although I do love the MAC for special occasions, I'll just go to the store and they can doll me up :o)

  11. Katie says

    i'm the SAME WAY! eyeliner, mascara, bronzer and that's IT! and i too have tried, but i just end up with eye goop in the corners of my eyes, more shadow on one eye than the other, and lookin' like i'm playin' with my momma's lipstick. SO, i'll stick to the plain ol' plain ol'. ah well. but you have GORGEOUS hair, i don't know if you know how to curl it like that or it's just natural. i have NO idea how to do anything to my hair but straighten it. plus, you don't need makeup. you're SUCH a pretty girl :)

  12. Dani @ OK, Dan says

    Autumn – Thank you so much! Your routine sounds so easy peasy! I may have to copycat your MAC idea for special events.

    Katie – lol@playin in mommas lipstick. Plain works well for you! you look great in all your photos! Thanks for the compliments, nah my hair is superduper curly I had to straighten and then curl in order to get those wavy results.

  13. LovelyBee says

    I honestly try to be as bareface as possible on days when I'm just hanging out, not doing anything important. I think it's good to let your face breathe a little; on those days I just wear tinted moisturizer and a lip balm.

    If i'm going somewhere I just wear like a pop of eyecolor and bronzer; BRONZER on my skin is amazing because it just defines my cheekbones that are quite hidden by my baby face.
    I don't know how those YT gurus do it seriously. I am learning right now how to apply liquid liner. I still don't know how to do it properly but hey, a girl can try! :)

  14. Dani @ OK, Dan says

    Bee – It's nice that you have a balance. I love your babyface, your avatar is so pretty. As for the liner…good luck! practice makes perfect. Those YTers make it look so easy!

  15. Stilettos And Coffee says

    OMG Dani! Love your blog.. Oh,and I have been thinking about this very same issue… trying to be more girly… and more "that girlish" but basically I'm a jeans and a flip flops kind of girl… I'll do blush, mascara, liner and gloss but that's it. I also feel it has something to do with my current occupation which I recently blogged about. But anyway… talk soon hun!

  16. Pammy Ponders @ Reflectorville says

    oh i couldnt go out without foundation and mascara.. i have my application time for make up down to a couple of minutes for everyday stuff though.. could do it with my eyes shut! cant do the eye makeup thing though!

  17. Dani @ OK, Dan says

    Stiletto – thanks! glad you stopped by. I saw your post about your new job. No stilletos out there tho!

    Pammy – you must be an application pro! Since you're good at it you may want to check the YT gurus to learn the eye makeup stuff. You'll be such a glamour girl!!!

  18. LaToya says

    I only use makeup to even my skin tone. light foundation, blush, maybe bronzer, and mascara and im done.

    this is an everyday thing, but im getting better at not panicking if i have to go someplace and my face is bare.

  19. Anonymous says

    Barefaced beauty definitely! I feel I look silly with makeup on. Sometimes I'll put on eyeliner and rub at it until you can barely see it and if I put anything on my lips I smudge and dab at it until you can barely see a tint left. I guess it's best for me to be a wash my face and go kinda gal.

  20. says

    I love that! I am more of an everyday, natural kind of make-up person. I don’t like to put too much on, although occasionally I dress up and get all fancy. You don’t need make-up anyways. You’re beautiful. It’s sad to see those girls who cake on their make-up when they already have beautiful faces, but they’re too self-conscious to go outside without any make-up on. More power to ya girl!

  21. says

    I am exactly like you…I like to be groomed but I only wear minimal makeup except on very formal occasions. Just a bit of tinted moisturizer, lip gloss and mascara. And that is it! :)
    New follower from SITS. :)

  22. says

    Barefaced….Little tinted lip gloss and mascara and I am out the door….Of course unless I am going out at night and then I do up the eyes for my hubby. :)

  23. says

    I haven’t worn makeup for close to twenty years. I used to. But I always found it work; it was not something I enjoyed. When my husband told me he liked my face without makeup (and meant it) that was my free pass. Once in a while I’ll put on some mascara and blush if we are getting pictures done. Just a touch so that my facial features have some definition.

    I enjoyed this post because I wish more women believed in themselves without putting on their face (not that I’m anti-makeup; if you love it, do it). I just know that there are so many women who think less of themselves if they don’t spend an hour putting themselves together.

    Also, I’ve been pondering the definition of being a girl. What it means and who defines it. This adds to my thoughts. Thanks!

  24. says

    A proud barefaced beauty here! I have never enjoyed putting on makeup. Makeup is for special occasions only here: weddings, funerals and family pictures. That’s pretty much it.

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