I saw this list and it gave me a chuckle. I thought you may dig it too.
10 Ways Having a Toddler is Like Being in Prison
- You can’t do anything without constant supervision
- Every morning begins with someone screaming at you to wake up
- You’re always terrified something bad will happen when you’re in the shower
- You’re always terrified someone is going to crawl into your bed in the middle of the night
- Meal time is fraught with tension
- Someone’s always watching you go to the bathroom
- You never get to choose the movie and then it’s hard to hear it over all the hooting and hollering
- You’re always terrified someone is going to punch, bite, tackle, stab or attack you with some kind of makeshift weapon
- Contraband — like booze, chocolate and adult entertainment — must be smuggled in and consumed in secret
- Conjugal visits are hard to come by, require intense scheduling, and are often interrupted
BONUS: One Way Having a Toddler is NOT Like Being in Prison
- Being placed in solitary confinement is a reward, not a punishment
I agree with them all except 7. We can’t watch a movie until our lil jailor is asleep. I could totally use some solitary confinement….not to mention some more conjugal visits! Plus, I always feel threatened while I’m eating, like that scene in that movie Life, where Martin Lawrence has to give up his cornbread to the big convict.
Here let me remind you.
I’m gunna need to re-watch that movie. It was pretty funny. Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence made a good pair, didn’t they?!
OK….totally off topic now….time to go!