10 Lies I Tell Myself Daily


::singing:: tell me lies tell me sweet little lies…. My inner voice is a liar. I lie to myself all the time. I realize the lies I tell myself help me get through the day sometimes. They’re necessary for survival.

Lie: I’ll finish that ____ when the kids go down for nap.

Truth: No the hell I won’t. I’ll lay down and try to recover for 20 minutes, then feel guilty for “wasting” time, tidy up a little then finally get back to work right before Kai wakes up and screams for me.

Lie: This is the last coffee of the day.

Truth: This is the last coffee for the morning.

Lie: When he turns 4 he’ll be calmer

Truth: My life will be a shambles until he’s like 12.


Lie: I’ll organize these drawers next weekend.

Truth: Not a chance. It just seems like the right thing to say when I’m digging through the disorganized bins annoyed at myself for not organizing them the last time I was digging through them annoyed at myself for not organizing them.

Lie: When they wake up from nap, they’ll be easier to deal with

Truth: Probably not, but I’ll be more caffeinated and prepared for them after having the time to breathe.

Lie: Homeschooling wont be so bad…

Truth: Yes it will. I’m probably going to ruin their brains.

Lie: This will just take a minute.

Truth: Nothing takes a minute anymore for me with these children. You know what does just take a minute? Breaking something, hitting kai, writing on the wall, falling from somewhere you shouldn’t be climbing, getting your finger stuck in a hole, sneaking playdoh into your mouth, throwing your shovel in the pond and then crying for it, locking yourself in the bathroom, getting half a grape stuck up your nostril, etc.

Lie: It’s not thaaat messy.

Truth: Yes the hell it is.

kaya be like - really bish

Lie: OK, today is the day there will be no time outs in this house.

Truth: It’s also the day my aunt keeps the kids.

Lie: I’m taking a bubble bath tonight

Truth: I’m going to drink a glass of wine and stand in the shower mentally scanning the day for things I did right as a mom and trying to stay awake long enough to get some work done.

I know I can’t be alone in this….

What lies do you tell yourself?


  1. says

    Your baby’s “not today” face has me dying!!! I lie to myself every damn day!!! And I have not one ounce of shame about. None…nada…zilch!

  2. says

    Since having my little man the biggest lie I tell myself is I’ll sleep when he does… Truth I’ll stare at him like a stalker then I’ll try to get something done right before I have to feed him again.

    • Dani says

      He’s Here!!!! Girl…you will stare at him and have him sleep on you…enjoy it. Don’t worry about anything else because you will miss it as he grows. TRUSTME. Just keep stalker-staring and love him up. I’m so happy for you!!! ((HUGG))

  3. says

    I make tons of lists at work in preparation for home, BUT my two yr old hinders and thwarts most of my awesome ass ideas. I am super Type A and freak out about stuff all the time and he asked me the other day if I was still cleaning the kitchen. I felt like poo so I stopped and played. Oh well

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *